75 Clever & Funny Coffee Quotes

Are you looking for witty and funny quotes about coffee? we’ve got you covered.

We believe there is a coffee date for every coffee lover. we rounded up all the best coffee quotes we love. enrich your coffee life with the following clever, beautiful and funny coffee quotes:

Reading: Best coffee quotes

2. “Today’s good mood is sponsored by coffee.”

– anonymous

3. “caffeine: keeps my personality sunny.”

– anonymous

4. “Three cups of coffee a day keep the doctor away!”

– anonymous

6. “Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break.”

– earl wilson

7. “a mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.”

– alfredo renyi

8. “why did the hipster burn his tongue? because he drank the coffee before it got cold. ”

– barista life

10. “I put coffee in my coffee.”

– anonymous

11. “The most dangerous drinking game is to see how long I can go without coffee.”

– anonymous

12.”I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I could be awake.”

-black lewis

13. “If you’re not coffee, chocolate, or bacon, I’m going to need you to go.”

– anonymous

14. “When my blood turns black as the moonless night, and my heart beats as the warriors march, only then will you be able to say, I’ve had enough coffee.”

– anonymous

17. “Sometimes I go hours without drinking coffee… it’s called sleeping.”

– anonymous

18. “It’s strange how drinking cups of water seems impossible, but 8 cups of coffee fall like a chubby kid on a seesaw.”

– anonymous

19. “Life without coffee is like something without something…sorry, I haven’t had coffee yet.”

– anonymous

21. “I like my coffee the way I like myself: strong, sweet, and too hot for you.”

-jac vanek

22. “If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.”

-abraham lincoln

23. “Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and start sneezing?”

– jean kerr

25. “My coffee machine is the most beautiful person in the world for me.”

— anonymous

26. “everyone should believe in something. I think I’ll have another coffee.”

— anonymous

27. “7 days without coffee makes you weak.

See also: 5 Máy Pha Cà Phê Casadio Chính Hãng – Giá khuyến mãi [2022]

— anonymous

28. “Doctors found traces of blood in my coffee stream.”

— anonymous

29. “coffee, because being an adult is difficult.”

– anonymous

30. “Coffee owns me, and I’m fine with that.”


31. “you’re a brewer.”

– anonymous

33. “I have no problem with caffeine. I have a problem without it.”

— anonymous

34. “sys not found: user login disabled”.

— anonymous

35. “Listen, before I had my coffee, I didn’t know how amazing today was going to be either.”

36. “want to hear a joke? decaf.”

– anonymous

37. “Maybe she was born with it. she maybe she is caffeine. ”

– anonymous

38. “Drink coffee and pretend to know what you are doing.”

– anonymous

40. “coffee, the favorite drink of the civilized world.”

– thomas jefferson

41. “Without my morning coffee, I’m like a piece of dried goat.”

– js bachelor

42. “It’s amazing how the world begins to change through the eyes of a cup of coffee.”

– donna a. favors

43. “Coffee is a drink that makes you sleepy when you don’t drink it.”

– alfonso allais

45. “too much coffee. but if it weren’t for the coffee, I wouldn’t have any identifiable personality.”

-david letterman

46. “Let your coffee take effect before reality does.”

– anonymous

47. “humanity feeds on coffee.”

– anonymous

48. “I judge a restaurant by the bread and the coffee.”

-burt lancaster

50. “Kids gather in coffee shops and basements to find out what is unsustainable in their communities. that’s the future.”

– ian somerhalder

51. “When life gives you lemons, trade them for coffee.”

– anonymous

52. “No one can understand the truth until they drink the foamy goodness of coffee.”

– sheikh abd-al-kadir

53. “Once you wake up and smell the coffee, it’s hard to go back to sleep.”

See also: 7 Best Instant Decaf Coffee Brands 2022 – Reviews, Top Picks & Guide

– fran drescher

55.”You cannot have a decent gastronomic culture without a decent coffee culture: the two things grow together.”

– adam gopnik

56. “we want to do many things; we are not in good shape. We didn’t sleep well. we are a little depressed. coffee solves all these problems in a delicious little cup.”

– jerry seinfeld

57. “The powers of a man’s mind are directly proportional to the amount of coffee he drank.”

-mr james mackintosh

58. “coffeology: espresso yourself. So many mixes, so little time. take life one sip at a time and stay grounded. best latte ever. take your time to smell the lid.”

– anonymous

60. “A bad day with coffee is better than a good day without it.”

– anonymous

61. “I don’t know how people live without coffee, I really don’t.”

-martha quinn

62. “People say that money can’t buy happiness. they lie. money buys coffee, coffee makes me happy!”

– anonymous

63. “I orchestrate my mornings with the melody of coffee.”

— terri guillemets

65. “adventure in life is good… consistency in coffee is even better.”

— justina headley

66. “I prefer to suffer with coffee than to be senseless.”

— Napoleon Bonaparte

67. “The road to success is paved in coffee.”

— anonymous

68. “There is no life without water. Because you need water to make coffee.”

— anonymous

70. “I’d rather have a coffee than a compliment right now.”

― Luisa May Alcott

71. “Coffee is a way of stealing time that should rightfully belong to your older self.”

― terry pratchett

72. “no matter where you’re from, or how you feel… there’s always peace in a strong cup of coffee.”

― gabriel bá

73. “Life is too short to drink bad coffee.”

– anonymous

74. “a little coffee, plus some thought, equals some great ideas.”

– anonymous

We hope you enjoy these coffee quotes as much as we do!

Share them with your friends during your coffee break, clink your coffee cups and tell us which one is your favourite.

Also, don’t forget to check out the coffee collection that keeps us sane!

See also: The Best Houston Specialty Coffee Roasters in 2022


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